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Cherry Grove and Fire Island Pines: The Famous Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender Resort Communities on the Atlantic
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| RECOMMENDED READING |
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| Into The Pines Kitchen Cookbook |
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Into the Pines Kitchen contains 200 recipes from 100 contributors, including Pines notables Scott Bromley, Gilbert Parker, and Hal Rubinstein. As a nod to bygone days, the book also features a posthumous contribution from John Whyte, one of the Pines' founders. The book includes original photography of the island from Pines artists William Karam, Mark Lonsbury, and Barbara Sahlman.
• More About this Book»
• Buy this Book Here» |
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| MEMORIAL |
| Intimates, Friends, Family & Colleagues Celebrate the Life of Lois Fisher |
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| by Bruce-Michael Gelbert | |
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photo by Ken M. Auletta
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Lois Fisher with Craig Tessler in SalPiro's 'TheLastDragShow' 1999
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Numerous members of Lois Darlene Fisher's chosen family, friends from Cherry Grove and elsewhere, and people she knew from Alcoholics Anonymous, where she had worked, gathered at the Quaker Friends Meeting House, in Manhattan, on June 17 to celebrate the life of the beloved New York and Fire Island resident. Lois, who was born in Delta, Colorado on April 22, 1937, passed away on May 11, in New York City, after a courageous 10-year battle with breast cancer.
Barbara Dowd, Lois' life partner since the mid-1990s, was the final speaker of the evening. Lois also left behind three beloved pets, her dachshund Gracie and two cats. Barbara chose June 17 for the memorial as "today is Gracie's seventh birthday," though Gracie wasn't present (although she had been smuggled into the hospital when Lois was there) because, "diva that she is, she would take the spotlight off Lois, and Lois loved center stage. She couldn't sing, she couldn't dance, but she loved being in Cherry Grove musicals." Lois, "a self-described army brat," lived in Japan and in Italy, but, originally from a small town, retained something of a "small-town sensibility" and, as a result, Barbara continued, "Lois taught me a lot about building community, building friendships." Barbara was very impressed with the longtime friendships that Lois maintained, including her strong friendship with Maggie McCorkle, who passed away on October 15, 2005 and had been a mainstay of Grove shows.
Near the end of Lois' life, when she was in hospice care, Barbara had let her know that she could let go, saying, "Maggie is out there somewhere waiting for you." Parked directly outside Lois' hospice window was a vehicle bearing the logo Maggie's Transport. Barbara added, "Lois thumbed her nose at the vehicle and said, 'Not yet, Maggie!'" Lois "tried to live life to the fullest" and, once, "three weeks after surgery, we were on safari in Botswana, riding elephants!"
"We knew each other for over 34 years," said Lois' longtime friend Audrey Hartmann, and "in these last years, when our friendship deepened, we spent a lot of time together." Audrey commented on "how much [Lois] loved Barbara and loved the pets," on the Scrabble games they played, and on Lois' "unbelievable courage." "Most of all," Audrey said, "I'm going to miss that beautiful, beautiful smile."
Diane Romano, President of the Cherry Grove Community Association, Inc. (CGCAI), with which Lois was very involved, also said, of Lois, "She had that smile that lit up the whole room. She was always cheery, always optimistic ... Lois was a leader in AA, a role model, an inspiration to cancer survivors." Diane recalled that she and her partner, Pat Goff, and Lois and Barbara went on a Galápagos vacation, which included snorkeling with sharks, "which I did not do, but Lois did do." They also went to Greece together. "Patricia and I are very proud that we were part of Lois' family of choice ... we will miss her very much," Diane concluded.
Rae DiStefano, former President of the Arts Project of Cherry Grove (APCG), with which Lois was also involved, said, "She was a very, very incredible person." Rae was originally Barbara's friend, but not close to Lois, because "she was sober and I was silly." Lois expressed interest in Barbara and asked Rae about her and Rae responded, "She's perfect!" Rae became close to Lois later on and said that, sometimes when Lois was upset with Barbara, she would say to Rae, "You know what your perfect friend Barbara Dowd did?" Rae noted that Lois loved Barbara very much and loved the rest of us. "She laughed at our silliness when we got silly, [but] she was there for us when things were grave."
Sally, one of Barbara's many siblings, said, "What I think of most about Lois is her great heart ... you could share anything with her and there was no pretense." Lois was a powerful woman, a role model, Sally said, but "she was humble." Sally commented on Lois' "wicked sense of humor" and said that she would take "the trouble she had and she would make it into a funny story." She deemed Lois "a sister of my heart."
"Lois loved being on the beach. She loved the water's edge," said Lois and Barbara's friend and Grove neighbor Geri LoSquadro, who also remarked on "that brilliant smile on her face."
Michael McPherson, who had offered welcoming remarks and introduced the speakers said, "There is no-one who knew Lois Fisher who did not love her ... she was no saint, and would probably be appalled" if one made her out to be one, but she "was as close to [being] a saint as one could be."
George Dawson said, "Even when she was in pain, through it all [Lois] loved life ... she really had no concept of how many people truly loved her." Doug Richardson, Lois' colleague from the General Services Office of AA, said, "She had this twinkle in her eye all the time ... Lois had a majesty about her that was just wonderful." In response to extreme chaos in the office, he said, Lois would declare, "It'll take more than you to sink this ship!"
Jeep, from Lois' support group at the LGBT Community Center said that Lois "was a mature dyke that all of the downtown women wanted ... she was a real role model for the downtown gay world." "She had a powerful presence," Jeep said, and commented on the "wisdom she was exuding at the support group ... As a matriarchal figure, she sought no power," although she had power just by virtue of who she was: an "example of how to live with cancer." Lois, said Jeep, "loved Barbara fiercely and gently, all at once, and she loved life fiercely and gently."
Ruth, a friend from the AA Board, who had flown in from Las Vegas, said that, in Lois' final days as a teacher, she had a principal whose wife she did not like, and that she introduced Ruth to her "principal, Mr. Smith, and his wife, Miss Grim Lips."
This "joyful celebration in honor of Lois Fisher" concluded with the playing of a recording of music that was meaningful to Lois: Judy Garland singing, "When You're Smiling (the whole world smiles with you)."
Donations in Lois' memory may be made to the CGCAI Benefactor's Fund, c/o Diane Romano, 306 West 19th Street, New York NY 10011; APCG, 332 Bleecker Street, #F10, NY NY 10014; or Cancer Initiative of the LGBT Community Center, 208 West 13th Street, NY NY 10011.
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